Whether you're just staring out or if you have been in Lolita for ages, making friends in the community is always a topic. There are many people who wish for Lolita friends they can enjoy the fashion with.
Lolita is a fashion that isn't exactly everyone's cup of tea, so your regular friends might not be interested in conversations about it. Due to being a niche hobby, it's also hard to find like-minded people in school or work. Even if there are fellow Lolitas among your classmates or coworkers, you may not even notice that you are living in hiding from each other
However, while it's always nice to hear about people finding each other by accident, it's usually very rare cases that usually don't happen, and it's not neccessary to make friends who share the same interest in Lolita in school or work. It's a lot easier and less troublesome to make Lolita friends elsewhere.
Having said that, there are two main ways to make Lolita friends without much efford:
- participate in Lolita events, whether they are private or brand ones
- post in the various Lolita groups and hashtags on social media
Lolita brands, both famous and indie, host various events through the year. There's also many small tea parties in cafes, workshops where you can make accessories, and large parties including fashion shows. By participating i tea parties hosted by your favorite Lolita brand, you can meet people who like the same style of Lolita. It's actually very easy to make friends with other people at the same table through natural conversation.
There may be some people who are worried about attending events alone, but that's actually what the majority of goests does. Even those who participate with friends are often people who met for the first time at a previous event.
What you need to pay attention to at Lolita events and tea parties is the dress code. The details often change a bit for each event, but the general rule of the thumb is to wear an outfit that features products from the Lolita brand that sponsors it. For more details on this topic, please see Tea Party Etiquette.
The are various forms of private meetups, but often it's also tea parties for the purpose of exchanging with other Lolita fashion lovers. While you often can dress as you want in your daily life, this is a good chance to show off your best outfit! As private meetups aren't held for commercial purposes, but as a fun way of sharing the love for Lolita fashion. In other words, the organizers don't gain any profit from it, and the are various kinds of fees. Don't forget to be polite and follow good manners, especially regarding money and time. If you have any questions or concerns, it's always a good idea to contact the organizer far in advance of the event.
Thanks to the development of social media, it has never been easier to connect with Lolita fashion enthusiasts from all over the world. Being able to make friends easily is probably one of the biggest favors of the internet in general. There are many cases of Lolitas who got to know each other from social media and then became friends in real life.
However, please be aware that there are many creeps out there who pretend to be a Lolita for the purpose of finding new victims. Of course it's easy to find new online friends by posting in ＃ロリィタ友達募集, but don't forget that not everyone's intentions are sincere and it's always better to be safe than sorry, so please be careful when you receive a message along the lines of "I would like to meet you" short after following each other.
No matter what social network, it's always recommended to know each other for months before meeting as by watching a person's daily posts and replies, it becomes really easy to tell if someone is actually into Lolita fashion or just some wierd creep. Also, it helps to see if you would get along with each other, and you still can meet up in real life later on.
There are many people who are longing for Lolita friends they can make fun activities with, such as twin outfits and photos. It's kind of difficult to find such friends in your daily life, so it's always a good idea to be active in the online Lolita community and attend the various Lolita events. Even if you aren't successful right away, friendships take a while to grow, but it will always pay off in the end.